Booty pleasure has become a pretty popular kink, and anal fingering is one of the easiest ways to explore the backdoor. It’s also a great way to help your anus relax.
But before you get started, it’s important to remember some ground rules. These include: Using lube (dry anal can tear!), keeping nails short, and asking for consent.
Start with the outside
A lot of people get squicked out by the idea of fingering their butts because of the potential poop factor, and if that’s a deal-breaker for you (or your partner), don’t worry. Your rectum is sealed off from the anal canal, so it’s unlikely you will encounter a big pile of feces during anal play (but even if you do, it’s not nearly as bad as you think; it’s just a little residue that some soap and water will easily wash away).
Anal fingering can be really naughty, especially when coupled with stroking or massage. A great way to test whether your partner is ready for you to slide your finger in is to gently rub the external border of their anus, called the perineum, with your index and middle fingers. If they are relaxed and respond positively, you can then begin to flex your finger muscles to encourage the muscle to open up.
Just remember to use lube — the skin in and around the anus is very thin, and dry anal can be painful. Some lube on your finger can help ease the pressure, and it’s important to keep it there during play. Some anal enthusiasts prefer to use a thick silicone lube, while others love a water-based lube. Be sure to reapply lube as needed throughout the session.
Insert a single finger
The tip of the finger, especially on a girl’s anus, is rife with delightful nerve endings. Insert it just past the first knuckle and start with light pressure. Move it around, tracing circles and increasing the thrusting intensity to see what feels best.
When she’s comfortable with the feel of a single finger up there, you can try pushing in further and further, paying attention to her response. The anus is a bit more sensitive than the vaginal opening, so it’s important to stay in control of your pressure and not overdo it.
Another difference between anal and vaginal play is that the anus doesn’t self-lubricate. Always have a good amount of lube with you when you’re fingering the ass. You can use saliva in a pinch, but if you’re going to be doing it for more than a moment, a good quality lube is the way to go.
It’s also a good idea to wear a glove or put a condom over your finger(s) so you don’t introduce bacteria. And make sure the nails on your fingers are short to avoid ragged edges that can cause internal tearing. Finally, constant communication to ensure your partner is relaxed and ready is key. And don’t forget to have a stash of wipes handy for any messy cleanup. A well-done anal fingering session can be intensely pleasurable for both partners.
After a few attempts at gently inserting and removing your finger, you should start to feel your anal canal relax. At this point, you can experiment with different strokes — just be careful not to push too hard or you could tear the anal canal (this is also called anal fissure). It’s recommended to use a thick silicone lube for this type of play because it will last longer than water-based ones.
If you want to take your anal pleasure to the next level, you can try combining it with stroking your penis or vulva. This can lead to some serious orgasms — just remember to keep it safe and make sure you have ample protection and plenty of lube on hand in case things get messy.
Before you even think about fingering your partner’s anus, make sure they’re in a comfortable position, and that they’ve had plenty of steamy foreplay to make them aroused. Next, have them lay down and spread their legs, then massage the anal cheeks with a lubed-up finger. When they’re relaxed, you can begin to slowly insert their finger into the anal hole and use circular and “come hither” motions — it’s up to them how far they want to go. This warm-up process will help them to acclimate to the sensation of having their anus touched in a sexual way, which can make them crave deep anal penetration even more.